bloggers_anonymous

Live Blogging with BDD

I sat down to write this post about, like, a million times today. The whole general idea is that BDD -- it stands for Blog Deficit Disorder -- is really hard to live with, and it's hard to concentrate enough on one post or one blog. It's hard to get anything done, bottom line, when you spend your whole day flitting from blog to blog. But it doesn't feel like flitting. It feels like I'm in a...well, community.

As I was starting to write earlier I got to thinking about what might be being published right then -- right that very second -- on all of the thousands, the millions, or blogs all around the country. The world, even. Sifry says there is a blog being added every second. That's 60 blogs a minute, 3600 blogs an hour. Or 85,400 new blogs a day, assuming that they work through the night. Some might be good. Some I should read. Some might link to me, maybe.

What's Seth Godin writing about today? Mark Vanderbeeken? Steve Rubel? Tara Hunt? Then I thought about the contributors at the MarketingProfs Daily Fix. I was thinking, "Wonder who is headlining today? Wonder who's over there commenting on stuff that's really important?"

So I thought, okay, before I write I'm going to need to get that monkey off my back. Just for a few minutes. I spend some time with Godin. Hah. He's always so wise. In a funny way. In a funny/wise way. Then I go to Rubel. Wow. How cool is he? Hold on. Gotta make a comment so I can get my name in the "Recent Comments" list. Woo-hoo! For four or five minutes I'm an A-lister! Yeah! Then I'm hangin' with Kathy Sierra. How does she get 135 comments on a single post? Wow...who's commenting, anyway? Mike Sansone. Mack Collier. Prashant. Be back in a sec.

Oh and Monica Powers commented on Mack's. So did JD. His American Idol stuff was great (33 comments -- woo-hoo!); that guy is a riot.

You see how it goes. It's not that it's hard to get anything done. It's just the opposite -- there's a lot going on; it's hard to...wait a sec. Now THIS is a good interview...

Anyway, TTYL!

Holiday Weekend Ignites "Blogger Withdrawal"

Memorial Day weekend.  The unofficial kickoff to summer.  Gathering with family and friends, grilling out, catching up on some yard work,—and wondering why that guy over in the corner of Panera is frantically tapping on his keyboard.

For thousands of blog addicted individuals,  Memorial Day weekend is an obstacle to their blogging habits and for those without access to technology, symptoms of Pervasive Blog Withdrawal (PBW) can set in immediately. 

“I was on a boat for the entire weekend—no wireless, no mobile, no nothing”.  Says one blogger.  “After going eight hours without a post, I could feel my hands shaking, and I couldn’t even keep my food down”.  Some bloggers were more fortunate.  “I told my wife that I needed to catch up on work and convinced her to let me take my laptop on our trip.  When she went to use the restroom at Panera, I quickly got out a post”.

Seems extreme?  Not to the addicted blogger.  While most typical Americans were out enjoying an extended weekend, Mack Collier who runs a blog called the Viral Garden was busy updating his Top 25 Marketing blogs list.  A post on his blog reads, “The Top 25 Marketing blogs, as always, will be published on Monday. Since I am addicted to blogging, I can't take the holiday off”.

Blogapathy Rampant in Blog Community

“Hey—did you watch the Bush/Blair press conference”? 
—“Uhhh—I think I was working on some posts that night”... 

It’s a conversation all too common throughout the blog community.  Blogapathy—a condition caused by excessive blogging leaves little time for keeping up with current events and pop culture.  “It’s like—I don’t even care anymore what goes on in the world—unless it affects my blog”—says one individual who’s identity we are protecting for privacy. 

Blogapathy is especially prevalent in the younger generation who traditionally tend to ignore world events—but are now tuning out once popular networks like MTV.  “What’s the TV supposed stand for?” says one youth “I know the M is for music, but the T and V?—I should Google this...”.

Hard to believe—but this is what we're seeing with both young and older bloggers alike.  With Blogapathy spreading so rapidly—one has to wonder what repercussions there will be in the long term.  But the real question is—will anyone care?

The Underbelly of Blog Celebrity

This illustration from Gaping Void shows just how cut-throat and pretentious the blogging world is.  It's a world filled with egos, (blegos), self-righteousness and celebrity-like naval gazing.  It's no wonder why bloggers are so easily addicted.  Please stop the madness.  Seek help today.

Blogslexia Affects 1 in 10

A new study has shown that one out of ten adults show signs of Blogslexia.  Blogslexic individuals interpret the word "blog" in place of the actual words they see.  This condition can often cause confusion in how information is both interpreted and processed.

Corporations have most been affected by Blogslexia.  The associated graphic shows how a simple visual can be misconstrued by a Blogslexic individual to mean something entirely different.  Usually it's related to Blogs.

For more information, Google Blogslexia.

BAD T-Shirts Are Here

Dear BlogAnon: Better than Sex?

As a new feature to Bloggers Anonymous, we will be providing life advice to those of you struggling with Blog related issues.  In our first post, we address the sad myth that Blogging is better than sex.

Dear BlogAnon.  A friend of mine recently came across this post suggesting Blogging is better than sex.  Is any of this true? 

Sincerely, Sex Crazed and Confused

10 Ways Blogging Is Better Than Sex
--------------------------------------------------

10. You feel agitated if you don't do it MORE THAN once a day.

9. In fact,  multiple posts in the same day are no problem – EVER.

8. You can manage two blogs at once (or more)! 

7. You always keep the lights on and the shades up – not just for fun once in a while.

6.  You think to yourself, “Man I bet she'd look hot in a Tequila template.”

5. You consider leaving comments on someone's blog that you are attracted to as 'having a quickie' with them.

4. You can do it alone.

3.  You only have to master one good “position.”

2.  You can jump from blog to blog at will, and your own blog never makes you feel guilty.

1. There’s no sugar-coating. When you suck, you’ll hear the truth.

--Dear Sex Crazed and Confused.  Despite the scientific evidence that Blogging actually triggers the same pleasure centers in the brain as Sex, it is in no way a replacement and should not be considered one.  Please resist the urge to replace sex with blogging.  "Blex" as we like to refer to it only leads to a path of self loathing and unfulfillment.

-Yours Truly—BlogAnon

Whose Problem Is It?

We at BlogAnon embrace different points of view—no matter how small minded and un-informed.  We pride ourselves in keeping our Blog Ego (BLEGO) in check.  In the spirit of polite discourse—we embrace this extremist viewpoint from Ann Handley.

"Listen up, friends. Blogging is not a disease; it’s a lifestyle. What’s more, it’s one that you’ve truly chosen and embraced. 

Societal pressure is intense, isn’t it? People always trying to make you what you’re not, trying to make you feel like there’s nothing wrong with them, suggesting it’s YOU who has a problem? 

It’s bunk, friends. Don’t buy it. Frankly, family is overrated."

Blog Intervention

It's difficult to watch this—but necessary in order to understand the disease.  Selina is one of the million individuals who need our help.  She doesn’t even know it.  Please take her cry for help seriously—what’s needed here is intervention, not apathy.

Twelve Steps To Blog Addiction Recovery (BAR)

There is no cure for Blog Addiction.  But there is recovery.  We call this proecss Blog Recovery Basics (BRB) fueled by our unique 12 step program:

   1. We admitted we were powerless over our addiction - that our blogs had become unmanageable
   2. Came to believe that a Sys Admin greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity
   3. Made a decision to turn our blogs, logins and passwords over to a trusted third party
   4. Made a searching and fearless content inventory of our blogs
   5. Admitted to Bloglines, to Feedburner and Technorati being the exact nature of our overposting
   6. Were entirely ready to have the RSS and Atom feeds removed from our sites
   7. Humbly asked our blogroll to remove links to us
   8. Made a list of all blogs we had linked, and became willing to delete them all
   9. Made chmods to our directories wherever possible
  10. Continued to take content inventory and when we were tempted to blog, promptly admitted it
  11. Sought through coffee and Tivo to improve our time offline and resolved to not check our Technorati rankings more than once a day
  12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

For further information—please contact Gabby Hon, VP BRB, North America.

Open Letter to Marketing Profs

It’s come to our attention that Marketing Profs, has taken the unfortunate position of mocking Blog Addiction.  Blog Addiction is a very serious and very real condition wreaking havoc in families across the globe.  We at Bloggers Anonymous do not condone this type of behavior and are sad to see that there are professional organizations out there making light of Blog Addiction, Compulsive Blogger Syndrome (CBS)  And Accute Blog Compulsion (ABC). 

Bloggers Anonymous would like to take this opportunity to encourage those suffering from this unfortunate affliction—to boycott Marketing Profs and related sites.  We regret taking this O’Reillyan action—but see no other alternatives. We will be happy to lift this boycott if Marketing Profs publishes a complete apology on their blog.

Please Join us in our cause.
The staff at Bloggers Anonymous.

The First Step is Admitting You Have A Problem

Congratulations!

You've made it this far.  By coming to terms with your condition—your chances of recovery have increased significantly.  Bloggers Anonymous will help see you through this difficult time.  Just remember—you are not alone.

Tell us a little about yourself here and let the recovery process begin!